Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Infuriating the Masses

I'm not talking about the Catholic Church. I'm talking about the male readership at Yahoo Shine - a site mostly meant for women, but men troll it to find women.

What I find the most fascinating about this forum is not only how poorly people spell (and I'm no goddess at it as you know) but the level of anger if you dare question people's beliefs.

It's also interesting to note that:

1. People tend to only comment when they disagree with you.

2. One really obnoxious comment encourages twenty others

3. People throw way more insults at a computer screen than they will in real life. Perhaps they forget that the person who originally took the time to write it might actually check back in to learn something. Which I have. Which, in this case, is that men don't like to be challenged on the fact that women that take their clothes off on film are not necessarily doing it with a busines plan in mind.

Anyway, am curious about your thoughts on this subject. Please don't feel the need to support me, but do me a favor if you have time and articulate where I went wrong in posing my argument. If I came off like a religious right winged anti-gay sanitized Lemon Pledge woman, that wasn't really my intent. I simply wanted a discussion.

I got one.

To entice you, here is my favorite rant so far. I wish I had those little hater boxes like in Dooce. One day... this from a woman actually. My favorite part is when I'm addressed by my proper name. In addition to being painted as a staunch butch feminist, I am also matronly.

Anyway, take it easy. See some of you at Blogher? Email me seperately with your #s so we can chat! BabyCenterAndrea@yahoo.com

Let's get something straight right now: The women who "write" for this site are not feminists. They're just flighty airheads who think that having an OPINION with no RESEARCH or FACTS to back it up is reason enough to go into an online tizzy and throw their whining text into cyberspace. This site is a detriment to feminism; this blog post is an embarassment.

There are so many problems with this blog post it's impossible to list them all. What proof of ANY kind does Ms. Frazer have that ANY woman who shows skin in the media is doing it for male approval? Ms. Frazer has equated Miley Cyrus being wrapped in a blanket to pornography to eating an entire package of Oreo cookies. A young girl wrapped in a blanket IS IN NO WAY PORNOGRAPHIC. Being NUDE and SHOWING SKIN are not the same thing. When was Britany Spears photographed NUDE? Pornography is NOT natural sex and is NOT a "natural function." The urge to eat an entire package of cookies isn't natural either. How is Ms. Frazer's sex life related to these things?

But what's Ms. Frazer's REAL problem? Is it just that she can't write? Is she ashamed of sexuality? Is she angry/jealous of our youth obsessed culture, yet unable to analyze or discuss this issue intelligently without ranting? Was she unsuccessfully attempting to discuss sexism in the male-dominated media while simultaneously blaming women for embracing their own sexuality? Does she lack even a fundamental understanding of European culture, which long ago abandoned the Puritanical sexual ideals that people like her hold so dear? Is her love for her daughter conditional, based on her wardrobe choices or lack thereof?

This post is juvenile at best. Based on the blog posts I've read from "writers" on this site affiliated with Good Housekeeping, I now consider that rag among the cheapest of tabloids.

More of my writing can be found on Goodhousekeeping
& Babycenter. I write under the name Andrea Frazer. Drop me a note! I’d love it! Or don’t.


Valerie said...


guess i'll have to get you a moomoo and some curlers for your hair while you sit around talking about how you hate sex and attempt to write.

seriously - i've never been able to understand why it is that Americans CANNOT ACCEPT THE FACT THAT SOMEONE MIGHT HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION THAN THEY DO!! and if, God forbid, you DO have a different opinion you're a 'fat jalous cow' or worse, they decide to attact your sexuality by calling you either butch, or some of the other things, that i won't go into here.

God bless Voltaire: I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. and my new favorite: "I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And He granted it.

'nuff said. i'm packing up my soapbox and going home.

Deb said...

Ouch! Sounds like she needs to have some sex and work out some of that anger, eh?

Loved the original article. I don't necessarily agree with all of it, but I think you had a lot of valid points and for the most part, I think you were right. Let's face, sex sells. But we need to make sure our baby girls don't think it's acceptable for them to be pose naked on a car for money as they grow into beautiful women. I want my girls to realize it's not necessary to do that to be recognized and yes, often, it can be demeaning. There's nothing wrong with being sexy and beautiful and kudos to those women who are - but why not be recognized for your smarts and your savvy as well?

Mama P said...

Deb and Valerie - What didn't work for you in the article? Am I generalizing or is it just my more conservative take on sex? I'd love to know - helps make me less of "airhead writer". LOL. Thanks.

MT said...

Dear airhead writer,
Totally kidding, I love your writing style, or at least the amount of it I've read so far in my stalking career. As per request for a critique, I hope this is only viewed as the contructive, in my humble opinion vein in which it is intended. Keep in mind also that I am sooo not a writer, I am a research scientist and thus anything I say should be taken with a grain, or pound, of salt.

I found the piece a little disjointed. I thought it touched on a lot of topics without actually discussing or forming an argument on any of them. To wit, the paragraphs were about sexy photoshoots, online trolls, porn, porn, models motivation, aging, sexism and aging, a wierd bit about the Spanish protest (maybe the link got changed, but all the males and females in the pics I saw were dressed identically), and then protecting our children (well your child, I extrapolated). I think that because it was so vague and touched on so many issues that the person reading it could read into it whatever beef they wanted to have. I had no beef so I read a nice funny commentary. Personally I disagreed with equating sexuality with nudity (as in the Miley Cyrus/Britney Spears section) or porn with nudity. Nudity to me is natural, sexuality about selling stuff (in this context), and porn, well that's a whole other comment altogether!!
I hope that helps?!?!

God's Guitar Girl said...

Girlfriend, I'm right there with you. Don't EVEN get me started about our society. And the guy who said that men are trying to have a Big O every time they get the chance is full of crap. Most of the time, maybe. But I can tell you that my drive is much higher than that of my partner, and we are only a year apart in age. Where have all the good ones gone???

Deb said...


Sorry - been a little crazy here and I couldn't answer your question until now...

There wasn't anything about your article that I found insulting or out of line. I admire people that can write like you do and can throw thier opinions out there and be damened what everyone else thinks. I enjoy your articles!

I have gotten more conservative as I have gotten older (I cringed when I wrote that) but I also have a hard time judging some of today's younger generation that are in the spotlight. I guess my take is, people make mistakes. Especially young people and young women who are thrown into the public eye. God knows that I've made my share of very bad decisions. And if the whole world knew about them, I would be mortified. Luckily, no one really cares what I do. I never had to deal with the whole world looking at something stupid I did and then disssecting my reasoning behind my decisions. I just think sometimes the public is too judgemental and makes a bigger deal of things than it should. And sometimes we need to just say - he or she made a bad decision. And let it go at that.

e. beck said...

hi .... i read the article ... and liked it .... you are a good writer ... with interesting points ... and some of your points are said to be funny more than to be a hard hitting journalist ... but, obviously, that is the nature of the magazine you write for, who you are, etc...

if i were inclined to post a comment on the article, i'd say, have you seen people mag? or us? or any like them? matthew mconacan'tspellhisname is bare in all his pics.... as are countless other buff boys .... and i don't mind .... i don't think it is as much a girl thing as a cultural thing .... all hot young things seem to want to be hotter and nekkider and in photos ....

and lastly, and this was touched on by a screamer in a comment ... men and women are different .... men are turned on much more visually ... most women don't want to see a bunch of random penises displayed ..... it is not appealing at all ....

some of those posters were just humorless, and perhaps rabid, to over react like they did ..... or maybe they just have tiny weenies ..... who's to know ....