Monday, March 26, 2007

Can You Laugh? Depends...

Old people are not what they once were.

Take for example the oversized maxi pads many of them wear. I am convinced, as of today, that they are for holding in urine due to guffaws of laughter. And frankly, after what my 76 year old mother sent me, courtesy of my 80 year old uncle, I could have used one a few moments ago. I am still laughing and just know you will love it. (Just copy the link and stick it in your browser... it'll take two secs!)

This little ditty, minus the blinking oiled men in their early twenties (damn blogger for not allowing that) comes to you courtesy of 85 year old Stella.

Male Strippers and the Red Hat Ladies

Last night, my Red Hat friends and I went to a Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a $10 bill.

When the male dancer came over to us, my friend licked the $10 bill and stuck it to his butt cheek!

Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a $20 bill.
She called the guy back, licks the $20 bill, and sticks it to his other butt cheek.

In another attempt to impress the rest of us, my third friend pulls out a $50 bill and calls the guy over, and licks the $50 bill. I'm worried about the way things are going,! but f ortunately, she just stuck it to one of his butt cheeks again.
My relief was short-lived.

Seeing the way things are going, the guy races over to me!
Now everyone's attention is focused on me, and the guy is egging me on to try to top the $50. My brain was churning as I reached for my wallet.

What could I do? The woman in me took over!

I got out my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his butt, Grabbed the eighty bucks, and left!!!!

Finally, here is the clip Texas Lizzy sent me from the previous post. Thanks, Meno, for showing me how to add links.


Happy Monday everyone! If my posts are short this week, it's simply because Rex is gone until late Friday (uggg) and I'm focusing much of my free time on some magazine nibbles. I'll let you know if anything transires.


meno said...

I'm so proud of you! :)

I love that red hat story.

amisare waswerebeen said...

That's not really you on the video, is it? Or does she just look like you enough that your son said that? Or is this a normal grocery store occurrence for you?

Mama P said...

Meno - You are a great teacher. Next, I need to know how to blog roll people. The quicker you answer, the quicker I will put your site on the top. Hee hee. But seriously, how do you do this? That's my last question for the month! (Only 5 days left of march - I get the better end of the deal, clearly.) HELP!!!!

Amisare - You goof! No, that's not me! My kids are actually really great at the store. I have them involved in picking stuff up and pushing carts around. But, I do look like that lady, yes.

amisare waswerebeen said...

Thanks for setting that straight. I got a real kick out of that video. I do this sometimes (minus throwing myself on the floor) when my son is just being ornery and he hates it.

By the way, tag! You're it! I tagged you for a short meme.

Erin said...

Oh no! I just read that Child is folding in June. Will your essay make it in prior to that? I've been looking forward to reading it!

Pam said...

I couldn't get the morningshow link, but loved the add. And the red hat story has me in stitches! My husbands Aunt is 82 and a Red Hatter, I'll have to pass it on.

Mama P said...

Erin - Yes, it's true. Child is folding. My editor is a class act, though, who wrote me immediately, saying how sorry she was about the article. Erin Quinlan, to be specific. I don't think she'd care. I got a few more details that, to honor her confidence (and perhaps drunken state? they were given a day's notice to leave their desks) I can't get into, but let's just say I feel worse for the staff than the freelancers. I'll find my way. About 5 emails went back and forth between us - she'll find her way, and if I can help it, when I establish myself, I'll get her the best gig I can find.

Pam - Did you try copying and pasting that link? It won't play just from my site. It really was hilarious.

Erin said...

A day's notice? It is a cold cold world.