Friday, September 29, 2006

That's The Ticket

10 Frivolous Things to Spend my Essay Writing Money On:

1. Hair cut
2. Pedicure/manicure
3. New makeup
4. New clothes
5. A maid twice/month
6. Babysitting each week (not trade)
7. New quilt
8. A girls' weekend away
9. A weekend away with Rex
10. A year round Disneyland Pass

10 Reasons Why I can't do this because I'm such a Dick wad

1. I got a speeding ticket going 55 in a 35 zone
2. In an attempt to be on time for my babysitting duties today, I left my make-up bag on my car hood. My ONLY make-up bag. At least some homeless lady is going to look spiffy. Nothing does a shopping cart right like Mac Burgandy.
3. I was fined 30.00 for turning in my library books late. Ahem... the kids' library books. I knew they were overdue a few weeks, but I was thinking "how much can 5cents/day be?" Not alot, back in 1983. Prices have gone up. (Irony was not lost on me that I'm trying to teach my kids to be responsible, but I then have to pay to keep their cards active.)
4. I lost two Visa Cards in two days. Perhaps the homeless person is also using my credit line for a new jogging suit.
5. I confused an Ebay order, therefore had to pay someone 15.00 to keep a good profile. As soon as I hit "send" I found the item I owed them.
6. More than a few pieces of chicken were left out overnight. Apparently Chicken A La Corpse is not that appetizing these days.
7, 8 9 & 10 to be inserted later. With my track record, this should take about 3 hours.

I am going to take it easy, put my kids to bed, and try to give myself a break. But this stuff just KILLS me.

Anyone have a similar story to make me feel better?


Princess in Galoshes said...

I went out to dinner with 4 people I kinda knew last night, and when the bill came, I threw down my card, thinking we'd all do the same... except the waitress swooped by and grabbed it as soon as it landed, and I got stuck with the whole tab.

Make you feel any better?

(I still say go for the pedicure. It'll be worth it. I'll join you.)

meno said...

i left my rowing skull right side up out in the rain.
It filled w/water
i ignored it for a month.
it leaks
i suck

amisare waswerebeen said...

I think I currently owe more than $60 to the library. Hope that makes you feel better.

Teri M. said...

So was the first just a fantasy list, or did you actually get said money? (I just want to be forewarned so that I can do some stretches before my cheering routine. heh)
Good grief, I hope that wasn't all in one day! :(

Andreia said...

I leave food out all the time and the pangs of guilt are terrible. My recent tossing of $20 worth of chicken about killed me!

Library fines come out of college funds at our house.

This was great!